College Road Trip

Obviously, I am way too old to take another one of those cool college road trips but God, in His amazing way with which He opens doors, allowed me to travel with the Johnson Royals basketball team on a 1300 mile round trip serving in my role as assistant coach. I continue to marvel at the surprises that God has in store for me when I know clearly that it is a blessing that I truly don't deserve. I get to learn more about the game I love and be involved in it in ways that I never would have imagined. Also, in small ways I can live out what God has put on my heart, being involved in peoples' lives hopefully mentoring them and serving them. It's quite joy and one with which I'm sure in many ways I need to grow more in.

Our first stop was to play the Virginia Military Institute in Lexington, VA. Better known as VMI, this is a NCAA Division 1 program with all of the support and talent that comes with a program like this. For a small non-scholarship school like ours, this is known as a "money" game. Teams from higher levels pay the school for us to play to obviously help them in working on their game. For our guys, it's a chance to do something only a few people get: play basketball at the D1 level. I marvel at the fact that I myself can now claim that I have coached a D1 game. The talent gap was quite obvious, the crowd was energetic and it was blowout. I hope that this game was one that each of the players can savor - not for the score but for the opportunity. Having the right perspective and learning how to deal with great adversity is good for character building. They even gave us Gatorade and pizza from a local restaurant after the game. That was a nice gift.

 

The next nice surprise was that the team was offered free lodging at an alumnus' house in town. To call it a house would be an understatement. It was more like a lodge or even a small palace (eight bedrooms, a man cave, large dining room and a master bathroom larger than my condo). The Thomas' were beyond generous hosts who not only provided housing, but that evening gave us an early Thanksgiving meal. With Turkey and all of the trimmings, it was a nice gift. I felt so blessed to meet such generous people. They had the wisdom to know that God has blessed them so that they could be a blessing to others. An added blessing for me was they had two fluffy white dogs that I couldn't get enough time to enjoy. It was like having two Mazies (my Great Pyrenees).


"The Load-Out" by Jackson Browne
And these towns all look the same
We just pass the time in our hotel rooms
And wander 'round backstage
Till those lights come up and we hear that crowd
And we remember why we came...

We got time to think of the ones we love
While the miles roll away
But the only time that seems too short
Is the time that we get to play

The bus: our home away from home.

Lots of time sitting around.

Game film at the hotel dining area.

Part of the life is finding time to wash uniforms between games.

A youth football team doing their game film.

To say that college basketball is all glamour and ease would be false. I'm not complaining in the least, but  small college athletics involves riding on a bus; very long rides. From Knoxville to Lexington was a good five hours and another five or so hours was required to make it to our next destination: Valley Forge, PA. Having college aged men requires frequent stops for food as well. Passing time can be a challenge so I resorted to sleeping, watching movies on my tablet and texting friends. I find it very interesting that in these days of smartphones, the players found ample ways to pass the time.

A road trip is not complete without some unforeseen "challenge". For this trip, we were not directly involved. The women's team bus hit a deer. Thankfully, nobody was hurt with the unlucky deer. Their bus on the other hand, had front end damage and needed to have the radiator replaced. This meant that we ended up sharing the bus we were travelling in while we were in Valley Forge. Before the trip, we had hoped to make it to Philadelphia and possibly New York City. Although we tried various ways to work around the bus sharing, it didn't work out. We were fortunate enough to be across the street from the King Of Prussia Mall which is the second largest mall in the US. That ended up being our down time entertainment for the stay.

I would like to say that our team fared well but sadly the outcomes weren't what we hoped for. I do see improvement. I appreciate their team first attitude. They're a young team (one Junior and the rest are sophomores and freshmen) so growing pains are evident. We challenged them to give it their all and I believe they responded well. We are close to getting to where we need to be. I know that can be said for me as a coach as well.

With our last game played, it was loading the bus at 9PM and driving all night back to Knoxville. Trying to get as much sleep as possible is the goal for us not driving. It's not the most glamorous life but one that I never thought I'd live out. The strange part was that the next day we were right back on the court for a game at another local college. It seems like the mantra is always "hurry up and wait".

Right back at it the next night after 13 hours on the bus.

The interesting thing for me is that I am still amazed that even at middle age, God is still teaching and revealing things to me. I have new adventures to live out and more that I must grow in. I'm thankful for a group of young men who are sharing a small part of their lives with me.

Xs, Os, and Ws: Inspirational Stories From Successful Basketball Coaches

Wow, talk about God working in crazy ways. First I was coaching, second, through LinkedIn I meet Nataniel Brown and now I'm in a book! I first want to thank Mr. Brown for kindly including my words and thoughts. Second, I really appreciate that he focused the book so much on character and the true coaching that basketball coaches have the chance to do: mentoring, guiding, teaching and loving their players in a way that will have a lifelong impact. As much as I love basketball and sports in general, I know that the real benefit from sports and coaching is the chance to help build and test character. To be honest, I'm not always good at that. I let my anger and hyper competitiveness get the best of me and at that time I'm really in need of forgiveness and a lot of grace.

I had a laugh (in a humble sort of way) that the back cover says "The greatest collection of coaches ever in one book!" Of course anything with Pat Summit, Lute Olson, Michael Cooper, Ben Howland, Terry Porter, Morgan Wooten and Anne Donovan has to be considered a great collection. I guess it's hard for me to see yours truly in that list.
In reading the book, what I see is the passion, struggles and heart that each coach has. What was universal for all of them is the need to redefine success. I think that wins and losses are important but also secondary to the life lessons that we model and teach. It was very encouraging to see that other coaches have that same passion.
In some ways this is an advertisement for the book. I will admit to that. I would also say I don't fully know all aspects of Mr. Brown's business/ministry. I do think his heart is in the right place. So here's my message: check out his website. Buy the book. At minimum you can read what I said and hold me accountable when I fail and perhaps you can read a little more of what another man thought of my words.

Remembrance

Proverbs 20:7

The righteous lead blameless lives;
    blessed are their children after them.

"Feeling like a dusty road inside me
Waiting for a drink of autumn rain
But inspite of all I am I can still turn and smile
When I reach the promised land I'll be stronger for the trial
Love's gonna rescue me"

I used to listen to this song when I went to the hospital to visit my mom while she battled cancer. It's by a friend named Bob Hudson. It really expresses that feeling when you are dealing with the dire circumstances of life. You feel lifeless inside; somehow you feel like you're going through the motions of living when in fact you're dealing with something deeply difficult. Watching my mom suffer was one of those times. It's almost as if God in His mercy allows us to dry up inside so that we can cope with such deep hurt. Along with that we so desperately desire relief - that drink of refreshing rain that can heal the hurt. I'm recalling all of this as I deal with the passing of my father. If you've read any of this blog you know that fatherhood, and manhood are recurring themes I touch on. So now I face the reality of mourning my dad. There's almost too much to deal with to express it all nor will I process it so easily. Grief and mourning is that way. We all do it in a personal way. I find myself more in a reflective mindset remembering my childhood and how my dad was in and out of my life. He was my coach, teacher, the hard working provider, mentor, displinarian and companion but also he was the yeller, the belittler and distant. I hold no animosity towards any of the latter. My dad was very much human as we all are.

The details of his passing are this: he suffered a hemorrhage stroke about three months ago. After surgery and rehabilitation, he was moved to an assisted living situation with the expectation of a decent and even full recovery. The past three weeks he started to grow weak and tired. The thought was that he still had fluid on the brain. Last Sunday, I spoke with my brother on plans for after his surgery. Those plans were not to be. That night he passed away peacefully expiring in his sleep. I think of how much my mom suffered and I feel that God was indeed very merciful to take my dad with minmal pain and very much like the man I knew. The next day came two strange feelings. The first came in the question, "Did I really hear that right?" I think shock has that effect on us. It's almost dream like when surprising and shocking news comes our way. The second was this emptiness knowing that this was the first day in my life that I have no earthly parents. From the day we're born, we have parents but for me after 48 years, that is not the case anymore.

Dealing with the details of putting his affairs in order has also reminded me of the differences between my generation and his. He was born into the Great Depression and his teen years were during World War II. His mother passed away when he was a teenager. I always wondered how the affected him. Like most Nisei (second generation Japanese Americans) he was the dutiful son who went to school, got a job, started a family, provided for that family and retired to play golf and travel. He was a hard working man. All of these qualities come from the mix of Japanese culture and the American culture of his era. Duty, honor and sacrifice are noble words that would describe him and so many others from this generation.

The closest my dad got to telling me he was proud of me and confirmed that I was a man

I would be remiss to say that as a human he had both great qualities and left gaps in my life as a father. As kids he never hugged us, told us he loved us, or that he was proud of us. He was demanding in a good way but also lacked the ability to encourage us and inspire us. I really don't hold any of this against him. I just know that I am no better than him as a father. It also gives me the great desire to know my Heavenly Father who fills those gaps in.

Conversely, I praise God that deep down, I know he loved me. I know that we had great times together. He's the man who taught me to throw a curve ball, hit a driver, shoot a jump shot, do long division, drive a stick shift and brush my teeth. It's so amazing that if you ask any man what the remember about their father it usually is something they did with him or something he taught them. One unique thing he taught me was how to solder. Even today at work when I smell solder, it bring me back to my dad's garage. Those are warm memories where I felt his strength and bond. We also got to travel to Japan together. That visit included seeing his father's house. He also was able to meet his cousin for the first time. He has told me that that time was very special to him. For me that meant a lot. It's a memory we got to share and is something I can carry with me the rest of my life.


"Searching for a road that isn't as lonely
Looking for a friend to ease the pain
I go back to where this started to find out what went wrong
No miracle cures for the broken heart and only time and shoulders to lean on
Love's gonna rescue me"

Many have asked how I'm doing through this part. In spite of everything, I feel peace. I really believe it's because I've had so many praying for me. Also, I have the best friends anyone could ever imagine who are there for me. The process to mourn does take time, but also comes out in different ways. I also have to admit that I have to be in "business mode" helping with settling my dad's affairs. That's a distraction that I used to use to avoid the pain. This time, I'm going to write, take walks and sit quietly by myself. God seems to work best in me when I do that. I know I'm going to miss him. I wish we had more time and that we could really truly talk about the important stuff. I'm sad that he was only a few months away from meeting his first great-grandchild. Mourning seems to be a lot about regret and "what ifs".

"But in spite of all I am I can still turn and smile
When I reach the promised land I'll be stronger for the trial
Love's gonna rescue me"

I also am thankful that my last words to my dad were "I love you." Such simple words, but are packed with power. I seriously didn't think that it would be the last time I saw him, but it is one of those moments where I said the right thing at the right time.

I know deep down that this is not the end of my time with dad. When God does reunite me with him, I look forward to then talking about some of the deep stuff that was too hard to talk through. I want to deeply thank him for being a great dad, grandfather and a great man. God is so great when it comes to second chances and I know that I will have that with my dad. In that, Christ is always about restoring relationships and more deeply our hearts. His love does rescue us. It is deeply painful and hugely uplifting. So my hope is that when I hear myself parroting his words as I coach basketball, or when I smell melting solder, I can turn and smile.

The Final Buzzer

The eventual, has just happened. Our season has come to an end and with it comes the mixed feelings of change in the air. The final third of the season started fairly uneventful with a few wins and losses and then two tournaments. There are times in a season where the grind of the game can get to you. I admit late in the season I let things get to me at times. I know that I deservedly so received my first two technical fouls and my first ejection.  There's much I have to learn about self control as God is still not done with me yet.
The Nashville Regional Tournament was a tough experience. We faced two of the best home school teams in the country. I was very happy to once again see the team rise to the occasion and fight hard. We stayed close for a half, but then the opponents pulled away. I'm always wondering just how each of the players feels going through all of this. The work so hard, but many times comes up short. It's not anything that they're doing wrong per se, but much of it is the hand that we're dealt. The final game was just one of those games where we were flat. I think we all knew that we should have beat this team but ended up losing by 3.

Moving on to the East Coast Finals Tournament I got a reminder of just how much these young men mean to me and the privilege it is to be their coach. Travelling 4.5 hours and then getting up for the first game was tough. We ended up getting down early and fighting back late. Sadly we lost by three points - another hard fought loss! Up next is an elite team that quite frankly was way beyond anything that we have ever faced. 43-11 record with games in France, Australia and a team of all stars. They have their own chartered plane and bus. Mark Cuban's brother OWNS the team. They blew out the other teams in pool play by 60 and 50 points. We fought hard as usual but something different happened. We stayed close for most of the game. I could sense that the coach was not happy that we were making a game of this. Eventually, their talent level and superior coaching got the better of us and they pulled away for a 30 point win. For some reason this game felt good losing by "only" 30. I think they expected a blow out in the first quarter. The handshake at the end of the game felt different. There was an acknowledgement of respect from both teams. I sense that our team felt it too. We turned a corner and possibly matured that night. Our next two games were wins where that toughness that we've developed over the course of the season payed off. These were more gutty wins that required us fighting through lots of tough moments. Hearing the final buzzer of the last win was sweet - we had earned the right to play in the 4A championship!

The championship game was another tough fought battle from very evenly matched teams. It was strange that I had a peace throughout the game. I couldn't figure out why since this was the biggest game of the season. We got down early and played even the rest of the way - early cold shooting and the absence of two players hurt us, but really, adversity is something to fight through not use as an excuse. Still down by 10 I called our last timeout with one minute to go. I gave some usual strategic words but then it hit me why I had peace through the game and so I shared it with the team. It was so real and hopefully very meaningful: I told them that in my mind it didn't matter if they won or lost the game, they were already champions to me. I actually choked up when I told them this because it hit me really deep. Like the last timeout in the movie Hoosiers, I finally get what the coach in the movie felt. When you put so much into the team, some of you is going with them and you feel the deep love for who they are as young men. I sincerely hope they enjoyed the game and the moment when they got the trophy. It was well earned and I hope a lifetime memory.

The sum total of this season as a Varsity basketball coach has left me with some great memories. I know that God challenged me to put myself in a position that is a stretch. I had to be a decision maker, a life guide, a teacher, and a mentor. This meant that many of my flaws were right out in front of people. It also opened me up to scrutiny and criticism. I had to face off against superior coaches and programs and faced losing. Through it I had to find a way to keep the team going in the right direction. I know that without God and God's gift of two amazing friends to assist me, I'm sure I would have failed badly. I can not thank God enough for having Mark and Bruce there for me. Mostly, this was about the team and how they have grown. I am amazed and humbled at how high a quality of character these young men possess. It is a testament of God, their families and the lives that they live. I know that I can say so much more about them but again I'll say that they are champions in my book. I look forward to seeing how they impact the world and be a blessing to others. For that, I'm thankful that God gave me this amazing opportunity.

Second Intermission: My Thoughts On Our Season So Far

We are now three quarters through the season. I realize just how time consuming it is to coach a high school basketball team, have an engineering job and still have all of life's chores to keep. If you follow this blog, you notice that I haven't been writing as much since the season started. I would also say that the time commitment has been worth it. I see the great privilege I have to teach, encourage and lead these fine young men. They are some of the best that any man could ever want as a son. Many of them are high caliber basketball players and all have worked very hard to improve on their skills. I see them becoming men of God who can impact and lead in this world. As a coach I hope that I can impart whatever has been given to me from God and other men who have impacted my life. I also hope I don't blow it as I feel the great responsibility of this position.

Proverbs 17:17
A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.

I can't say enough about the assistant coaches I have working with me. Mark and Bruce are the highest quality of Godly men who keep me grounded and humble. Beyond that I can think of many times when their basketball input was invaluable. Bruce came up with the defensive scheme that helped us take on one of the top teams in this area and kept us close the whole way. Mark once spotted that a team's press was focused too much on the middle of the court and the sidelines were wide open. Stuff like that can elude me and they have the insight to countless occurences that helped the team. More than anything, I feel like we're on the same page with what we want to accomplish with the team. Leading them to see teamwork, hard work, fighting through adversity and winning shows the characteristics that God desires for the team to have in life. I am deeply indebted to these men for the help, wisdom and friendship.

Looking back in life, I see that one thing that I like to do is be analytical when it comes to watching sports. Perhaps it's because I was mostly a bench warmer or perhaps it has to do with my "geeky" side. Anyway, I find myself very much alive during the games. Seeing things and figuring out how best to get the most out of the team is really invigorating. I also love seeing the team succeed. It's funny, my competitive side is really strong, but I'm more passionate about the boys being able to succeed than just getting the win. I want so bad for them to get the taste of victory that comes from working hard as a team.

Running Rick Torbett's Read And React offense continues to amaze me. I continue to get compliments about how the offense flows. When it works and the team runs it well, it's a beautiful thing to behold. It's a scheme that can't be scouted and works well against all defenses. After two seasons, I think we're getting more and more into it. I realize that it requires a lot of conditioning to run this. With comfortability I hope that we can learn to outwork the opposition and hunt for those scoring chances. My secret hope is to see multiple staggered screens come to fruition. Then I'll be a little kid again watching  Rick Barry at Oracle Arena.

We now have installed four defenses. We have the standard 2-3 zone that work well against bigger teams. I maybe too stubborn to use it a lot. Perhaps it's so familiar I want to give the team's a different look. The chaser is something I really enjoy watching. It confuses teams and can really be effective. It's a matchup zone that requires an long athletic "chaser". I'm so glad we have two players who fit that role well. I'm surprised that we have been very effective in man to man. Considering the team's youth and relative lack of size, we have done quite well in it. I use it a lot more than I expected. It just goes to show how mature our team has become. We just added a half court trap. Right now, it's a work in progress. I think I need some tweaks to get it to work better. My hope is that this can work well when we're down and also get us some momentum at times.

Our practices were getting stale (as they usually do during the season). I'm so glad I read up on some coaches boards as one gave me the great idea of making practices a competition. Keeping score of each drill has taken the intensity and focus to a new level. I've even said the team that "wins" the practice is the starting team for the next game. Competition is in a man's DNA. It just took one tweak to bring it out and give our practices the next level of intensity that I was looking for. Nice to see the team completely gassed after a practice. I'm hoping they will see there's always a next level to achieve.

Isaiah 30:20
Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them.

Friday was perhaps a significant day for team team. We played Christian Academy of Knoxville which is ranked number 6 in East Tennessee. They have two players who have Division 1 scholarships and their best player is an underclassman. They have first class facilities and it was senior night. Considering we have a a small talent pool, no facilities and an all volunteer staff, games like this one can become embarrassing very fast. Not so tonight. We had the lead at the half. It was close for most of the third quarter. The coach tried at least four different defenses to stop us. I could tell the home crowd was very concerned. Sadly, they did wear us down and we ended up losing. But we gained so much more: we earned the respect of everybody in that gym; we proved to ourselves that we belong with one of the best in the area; and we do have a next level that we can achieve. I can never say I'm glad we lost a game, but it was something to behold knowing what we proved. It's like the first Rocky movie: he loses the fight but wins something deeper and more gratifying. I even got a my fan boy moment when Atlee Hammaker (former San Francisco Giants pitcher) took the time to come up to me to say how impressed he was with the team. I count that as a little gift from God that would mean something to me.

We are 10-20 right now but take away losses to the 2A and private schools and we're very close to .500. We are ranked #10 in the Southeast for home school programs! With four sophomore, five juniors and one senior, the future is bright!